Positive words

So today I learned something new! That always makes for a great day, I think! I was talking with a lady from the Child Development Center, who comes every two weeks to do speech therapy and fine motor skills work, with my daughter. She has taught us sign language, and just useful different ways to teach my child the simple things that she's struggling with. Like using a spoon, sipping from a cup, stacking blocks on each other all the fine motor skills. She is having great success with all the extra help from our new friend and she's mastering holding a crayon, using a spoon, trying her cups to drink from. Its been so fun to see her achieve little milestones that alot of other parents take for granted that their kids pick up really fast. And she's so proud of her little self too!

But today was a special day for us. It all started when my daughter was playing with her new friend and the lady asked her to pass her a certain toy, and my daughter threw it at her head, with alot of anger. I wasn't really surprised because its something thats been happening alot around here....everything gets thrown at our heads when we ask for it. So as a mom, my first response is to say "Don't throw that". And my friend was telling me that I should try a different approach. (anyone who knows me as a mommy knows i'm always up for advice on things that could help out! I am learning here!) She says that everytime I say "Don't touch, or Don't throw", in her little 21 month old brain, she's hearing Throw, Touch, and the "don't" part of it, just tells her little head that mommy is upset with me. So she suggested that I change how I say things to the positive. Instead of Don't throw, she says to say, "We pass toys gently", or just plain old "Give it to me" (in a nice voice of course!) She said when she had a daycare years ago, she learned quickly that when the kids were all running around and she would hollar "stop running" they heard running, and nothing ever changed. So she changed the words to "we walk in this house" and she said almost instantly they would calm down and stop running.

And it got me really thinking...how can I put this positive spin on my everyday life, not just to my child. And it got me thinking of my relationship with my fiance, and my parents and sibling and other family, co-workers, even clients. That in everyday scenario's I think alot of us use negative words, instead of positive words, without even realizing the damage we are doing to our souls. How many times have I looked in the mirror and said "Gosh i'm so fat", "oh these pants are too tight because my butt is so huge". I dont remember looking into the mirror and saying "hey hot stuff, you look amazing today" hahaha, ok i dont have to go that far but you catch my drift!

Life is all about how we make it. And when bad days happen, and trust me, they will happen to us. How do you approach the situation? Is your glass half empty, or half full? Try going one day correcting yourself on how many times you say something in the negative spin without even realizing you are doing it. Try a "yes" day where all day long you let your child do whatever they want, eat whatever they want (within healthy reason of course) and stop yourself from saying "don't" so often. I tried it today and I had to bite my tongue so many times! I had no idea how often I'm telling her not to touch something....just because it bothered me. Not because it was actually dangerous. I mean if she changes the channel on the tv on me, is life really going to halt to a stop?

I challange you all to try it. At my work I'm in the beauty industry, and all day I have clients asking "would this style look good on me?" and its up to us to spin it around so that they leave feeling incredible. Instead of saying "well you dont really have that kind of hair like the picture", maybe suggest we do a similar style thats a little more customized for your face shape and for the amount of time you are willing to put into styling it everyday. That sounds alot better than "no you dont have thick enough hair for that".

I really think by putting a positive spin on everything you say, will make your life happier. And it will be alot easier to handle the bumps in the road.

Life is beautiful....say yes!!!!